“…and what you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses entrust to faithful men who will be able to teach others also.”
– 2 Timothy 2:2

Some time ago, I wrote a post concerning living a life of consequence whose title was “You Cannot Eat Like a Sparrow and Defecate Like an Elephant.”  My purpose in writing it — and the subsequent posts elaborating on it — was to emphasize that it takes preparation, planning and plain hard work to become a man of substance.

My hope is that you who read this blog have committed to live up to your potential and to stand out for all the right reasons.  If you’ve decided to live a life of consequence, discover your purpose, develop a hunger and thirst for wisdom, devote yourself to the process of becoming the man you’re created to be, and deliver results in every circumstance, you have already begun to acquire theoretical knowledge and practical experience.  Good.  Keep at it.

Making memories: Camping with my sons near Chimney Rock last century.  I still have the same hairstyle.

Here’s the thing: what good will it do for you to have wisdom if it dies with you.  This is why in your prime, a man should determine to live and pass on a legacy of thriving, authentic masculinity to his sons, godsons, nephews, protégés, friends, brothers and others in his circle of influence.  Given the current crisis in masculinity, my bet is you already know men who would benefit from what you now have, maybe in your own family.

Friendships
John Eldredge said that masculinity is an essence that passes from man to man.  If your community is typical, you probably have several friends who grew up or are growing up without a dad.  You may even be one of them.  If you’ve made up your mind to be the best possible version of yourself, round up some like-minded friends and encourage each other.  You may feel — and be — outnumbered, but you can make more progress if you know you’re not alone.

Mentoring
I’ve written about this from the standpoint of encouraging you to get a mentor.  When you think you’re 80% ready, I want you to look for an opportunity to become a mentor to a younger man.  Even if you’re currently in college, you’re already in position to help prepare young men in middle school for the pivotal high school years.  Think how valuable it would have been to have had a mentor to share his wisdom when you were in high school.  Some men muse about what they’d say to their younger selves if they could go back in time.  Being a mentor is the next best thing.

Volunteering
There is hardly an institution that isn’t crying for the involvement of authentic men.  Paradoxically, serving others will do more for you than years of introspection.  So get involved where what you are learning about being a man would be respected and valued. Here are a few suggestions:

• Teach a boys’ Sunday School class or lead a church youth group
• Be a study buddy at an inner city school
• Join Big Brothers and come alongside a disadvantaged young man
• Train and become part of your state’s guardian ad litem program — There’s a profound need for men to assist boys in the family court system.
• Be a Scouting volunteer – The venerable institution has taken a beating lately, but still teaches boys valuable skills.  I’m an Eagle Scout and appreciate the lessons I learned as a scout and later as a volunteer.
• Volunteer as a leader for Trail Life USA – a new, specifically Christian alternative to scouting that teaches character, leadership, service and integrity.  Be part of something new and teach boys how to become better men.

Note: You need to walk the talk to do any of these well.  Get healed, then go help. 

Fatherhood
Here it is:  the best opportunity you’ll ever have to pass on faith, hope and love as well as your name.  Fathers get a raw deal in the media — from being cast as dimwitted dolts (looking at you, Homer Simpson) to being portrayed as cold-hearted abusers.  The result of this negative characterization is that our culture has denigrated masculinity generally and all but declared fatherhood irrelevant.  You know this isn’t right.

Here, then, is what I propose: Become the best version of yourself — and with wisdom acquire rock solid confidence in the value you hold as a man of consequence.  Commit to your mission, seeking the adventure that God Himself has ordained for you, and invite a quality, Godly woman to join you on your quest.  Marry her before having children with her.

When God blesses you with children, model virtue and actively teach it.  Invest your time in them.  Make memories.  Make fun memories.  If you’re the father of sons, don’t neglect the importance of adventure to the heart of a boy, and make it a point to initiate them into manhood.

If your dad was absent or otherwise less than he should have been, don’t let your own lack convince you that it can’t be done — or that you can’t be a great father to your children.  “The glory of God is man fully alive,” said Saint Irenaeus.  Don’t withhold from God the glory He is due; be a Father in His image.