Treasured Friendships Make a Man Rich

Here's to the ones that know you and love you anyway

“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” – Proverbs 17:17 I just came back from a long weekend with four of my oldest — in terms of length of friendship — friends. We arranged to meet for a four-day weekend on the North Carolina coast to catch up, watch […]

Re-Post: Crisis? What Crisis?

It is  is hard to describe the condition of masculinity in the US  as anything other than grim.  Women earn close to 60% of the college degrees awarded each year, and since a college degree is the price of admission to most salaried jobs, this places men at a disadvantage in launching a career.  The knowledge […]

Re-Post: Meet the Hall of Fame Running Back Who Didn’t Like Football


Note: In honor of the start of football season, here’s a post from the early days of this blog. For a lot of men, fall means football.  Perhaps it’s the memory of their own playing days in Pop Warner leagues, sandlot games or the varsity squad.  Maybe it’s memories of going to games with Dad.  Or […]

Why Every Man Should Strive for Work He Loves

The Dignity and Sacredness of Work

“From the primal elements you brought forth the human race, and blessed us with memory, reason, and skill. You made us the rulers of creation…” – The Book of Common Prayer (Rite II, Eucharistic Prayer C) Here in the US we’ve just commemorated Labor Day which, despite its origins as a celebration of trade unionism, […]

How To Fire Up the Engine of Your Effectiveness

Why you need Passion, Purpose and Potential to thrive

“You can’t go around half-pregnant.” – A famous saying by my uncle. Our mission here at Ontozoan – One Real Life is to motivate and inspire men to embrace Thriving Authentic Masculinity and to become the best possible version of themselves. Part of the way we accomplish this is through my passing along lessons I’ve […]

How Cultivating Resilience Can Save Your Life

Suicide sucks -- ask the ones who've been there. Oh wait.

“No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he’ll never let you be pushed past your limit; he’ll always be there to help you come through it.” -1 Corinthians 10:13 (MSG) […]

On Stock Cars and Station Wagons

Why confusing love and marriage leads to dysfunction

Commenter Dale provided a reminder recently of an important concept that deserves more attention: “Dalrock, on his blog, has somewhat regularly been hitting the idea that we have love and marriage totally backwards. We think that a relationship of romantic love is the correct place in which to have sex and create marriage. A consequence […]

In A Prominent Bar in Secaucus One Day

Sometimes stories make the point more effectively

“Many people die with their music still in them.” – Oliver Wendell Homes, Sr. There has been a lot of heavy stuff happening of late. Let’s lighten up — just a bit — with another visit to the poetry corner. Here is a 2007 poem by X. J. Kennedy: In a Prominent Bar in Secaucus […]

Seven-and-a-half Tips for Masculine Initiation – And Why They Matter

“Of all sad words of tongue or pen the saddest are these IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN” -Anonymous I have written about the importance of masculine initiation here and here, and I’ve featured a post written by my older son providing his perspective.  In this post, I want to provide some practical considerations against the day […]

What Are You Doing Here? – Discover Your Purpose

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”  – Howard Thurman (1900-1981) In the movie Boyhood, the young protagonist asks his father what it all means.  Their conversation goes like this: Mason: So what’s the point? Dad: […]